Sunday, August 30, 2015

Who's On First, Who's Out First?

Ok, those of us who follow politics closely have had a chance to see what's out there, so let's do a little critiquing shall we? Who is looking good with STAYING POWER, who's just staying afloat with money and who's on life support?

1. Trump: Who woulda figured? But I still don't see him going anywhere. As I've said repeatedly, he's riding ONE issue and his support is no more than a clarion call to the establishment; GET IMMIGRATION FIXED! Some are still too friggin' dumb to see this simple fact and, well, money can't by me love and if you think crossing a border for money is love then your ass is grass.
2. Bush: See previous. But I am enjoying the slow burn of the country club Republicans! I hope it hurts!
3. Carson: I like Ben Carson. The man has good ideas, his politics are right on and he's brilliant. But smarts ain't enough. Although he's a quick learner, politics at this level requires a skill set few possess. I doubt he'll be able to keep up but if he can then I'm onboard all the way.
4. Rubio: Marco is the best politician in the bunch. He comes across as being genuine without pandering. I can see him winning but I still don't trust the guy on immigration. If he nails that down it's off to the races.
5. Walker: After what he did in Wisconsin Walker was a lot of folk's early choice, including mine. But he's kind of bland on the stump. Dullsville might play in Racine (Cheeseheads in general are very subdued, unless they're playing the Vikings) but he's got to show some fire along with the ice.
6. Cruz: I think Ted Cruz is deceptively brilliant. He's been careful not to criticize Trump and is even cozying up to him a bit. His views on immigration are nearly identical but a lot less bombastic. I think he's positioning himself to pick up the pieces when Trump does finally implode.
7. Huckabee: The religious fundamentalist's candidate. He's gonna pull 10% just about everywhere apart from Greenwich Village, Chapel Hill, Provincetown and the Maryland Eastern shore, but that's it, he's maxed out. He's an also, also ran.
8. Fiorina: I LOVE THIS WOMAN! If the Tickbite primary were today I'd vote Fiorina President and Earl "The Squirrel" Odell for mayor (the man is to squirrels what Mini-soda dentists are to lions!). I like her style, I like her demeanor, I like her policies and I like her guts. Politics is funny. As a woman she could turn the tables on Democrats and get through a lot of things a man perhaps couldn't. Choosing her would put identity politics in our corner for a change.
9. Paul: Trump nailed him, too WEIRD!
10. The rest: Kasich (Bush clone) Christie (sell by date expired) Perry (retread...with holes) Jindal (too nerdy) Gilmore (who?) Graham (fat girl in a bikini, can't bear to look at him) Pataki (a New Yorker, really?) Santorum (a Yankee version of Huckabee).

Now, nobody here gets your putter to flutter? There are others you know. Let's have a look.
•Andy Martin; a lawyer from Connecticut. He has a long history of litigation (as a defendant) and some view him as an anti-semite. Too bad, he coulda been in the hunt.
•Kerry Bowers; ECU educated and Nevada resident, Bowers is a 30 year career military guy and from what I read a quality conservative through and through. But come on dude, you might want to start off with something a little more attainable than President. Just the fact you're running calls your judgment into question.
•K. Ross Newland; in a nutshell a religious zealot.
•Jack Fellure; this guy is hilarious. He's been running for President since 1988. Part of his platform is to bring back prohibition and criminalize homosexuality. He'd do well in Tehran I'm thinking.
•Jefferson Sherman; gee, the name is so schizophrenic, anyway he's a garden variety, small government conservative.
•John Dummett Jr.; a self-described small government conservative who feels "disenfranchised" by both the Republicans and Democrats. I can relate John.
•Shawna Sterling; hates GMOs and vows to ban them from school cafeterias. Pennsylvania Avenue here we go!
•George Bailey; black preacher with heart disease. He needs to talk to Dr. Carson I'm thinking.
•Mark Everton; hates the federal reserve and advocates a one term limit for Presidents. Sounds right to me.
•Estaban Oliverez; a Geraldo Rivera Republican. He needs a show on MSNBC, he'd be right at home.
• Michael Bickelmeyer; I LOVE THIS GUY! He, and I quote "takes a dim view of terrorists and drug traffickers...and wants to fry them from orbit". Holy Shit Batman, this dude is happening! Damn! Where can I send money!
•Bartholomew James Lower; solar power nut.
•Eric Cavanagh; favors a 100% "porn tax" and would "wipe away" all criminal records after three months! Hmmm, wonder what this guy's life experiences have been? No idea but I sure don't want him moving in next door I don't mind telling you.

Jesus, anyway what with the dogs and the kid and Sgt. Major yelling in my ear (Blogging again!? That's it, I'm getting a new car) I forgot what I was posting about.
By the end of September the first out will be all of #10 starting with Gilmore and Graham with Perry not far behind. The rest might hang on a bit longer but you won't even know they're there. By Christmas we'll have maybe five or six solid candidates, and guess what? Jeb might not be one of them.

Well that's it. I report and you can piss off.



1 comment:

  1. Bush is folding early. I realize that the 19th Hole Republicans may lament it, but the public just doesn't like him. I don't like him. I liked George W., not even so much as president as I like him as a man. Little Brother Jeb isn't ready for prime time even with the political talent he has propping him up. He's Hillary without the deceptive viper vibe, or the comfortable lesbian loafers.

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