Hipster-in-Chief Twitter Town Hall

Yesterday, POTUS held a Twitter Town Hall in which his subjects could tweet their questions in hopes of receiving a personal answer from the President himself. Although it is difficult to say "Iowahawk" without its preceding "The Incomparable," you simply must read the tweets T.I. Iowahawk sent. A quick sampling of some of the better ones (but do visit the link):

"An $8 billion high speed train leaves Chicago for Iowa City at 8:15am at 40mph. Why?

If shovel-ready projects create jobs, wouldn't spoon-ready projects create even more jobs?

Subtract Malia's age from the number of states. Multiply the result by the number of jobs saved or created.

I let my Mexican drug lord license expire. Am I still eligible for the free machine gun program?

When you're visiting his volcano lair, does George Soros let you feed the laser sharks?

The staffer who suggested this Twitter Town Hall is fired, isn't he?

Why isn't your cabinet unionized?

If Joe Biden has a massive stroke, (a) do you have a replacement in mind, and (b) how would you tell?

When you said "days not weeks" did you mean Venusian days?

I understand you finally quit smoking. Do they make a patch for spending addicts too?

Is this question racist?

Why do you need permission to be clear, and not need permission to bomb Libya?

Are you in favor of gay marriage for Libyan bombing crews on Boeing planes made in South Carolina?
On behalf of the entire US population: dude, WTF?

Let's say instead of winning the future, we end up in a tie. Do we then go to sudden death overtime?

If we reneg on the debt, where's the best place to hide our stuff from the repo men?

If ATMs are so bad, why do you keep treating me like one?

Are strawmen cheaper when you buy them by the gross?

How much CO2 is created by a burning straw man?

This whole Twitter Town Hall thing is turning out to be another amateur disaster, isn't it?

If Eric Holder gets indicted in Operation Fast & Furious, should he get a civilian trial?

If we eat the rich, what do we get for dessert?

if punishing employers results in more employment, can you also punish beer makers?

Psst... got any spare tix for the 2016 Chicago Olympics?

Since you've doubled the number of wars, shouldn't you be getting another Nobel Peace Prize?

Does it bother you that your Twitter stunt worked out better for me than you?

Will you be my 10,000th follower?"

This guy (Iowahawk, not POTUS) is an absolute pro.