Wednesday, December 31, 2014

The Goal: 150's by 50

THIS
On December 27, 2014, I turned 49.5 years old. On that date I weighed an astounding 198.8 lbs.  It is astounding for two reasons--the first is that some of you may have noticed that I am not necessarily a very tall man.  So 198.8 lbs is not a flattering mass for someone of my modest height.  The other reason it is astounding is that some of you may have noticed as well that I am not without a touch of vanity, And for someone who has such a positive estimation of himself, corpulence of this degree is a stark discontinuity.

Egged on by General Dan and in service to both my height and my vanity, I have arrived at a 2015 weight goal of "150's by 50".  That is, on the morning of my 50th Birthday (June 27th) I endeavor to weigh something less than 160 lbs.

I enlist you, my friends, readers, and trolls, to join me in this quest.

In the regular semi-recurring "Big Fat Friday Free For All" posts, I will update you on my straight-line progress toward this goal.  Possibly with graphs.

TO THIS!!!
In the comment section (of the blog, not Facebook), I invite those of you with a goal for the year to report your progress on it.  Weight, exercise, gardening--whatever it is you want to achieve this year, shout out in the comment section.

Oh, and this is NOT an invitation to advise me on how to do this, or how you did it.  Thank you.

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Time to "Get Back"

Poor CW has got himself all worked up over Virginia being #3 in the college hoops polls. The Wahoos are 11-0 having whipped mighty ass against opponents like JMU, South Carolina State and Harvard (76-27). Ok fine, let him have his fun, it's still real early so who knows(?) Virginia might actually be good this year. I damn sure hope so because the ACC ain't what it used to be...by a long shot!

OK Duke is still top ten and Louisville (one of the new kids on the block) is as well, but UNC is second tier and is trading off their name, two time National Champions NC State (1974, 1983) is nowhere to be found, Wake Forest is AWOL and Mary-land is ranked but sadly bolted the league. Mention John Salley or Mark Price and you'll only elicit a "who dat" in Atlanta. FSU Miami? Please! In short the ACC sucks...again! We haven't won the BIG ONE since Duke in '10 and unless Louisville steps up we ain't gonna win it this year.


I can remember a time when ACC b-ball was FEARED, now we're just another "good" league. Don't worry, I'm not going to rant about how BC and Syracuse and Pitt bring absolutely NOTHING to the table or exactly WTF Notre Dame is doing being admitted as a, what is it, a partial member? (As if we need Notre Dame in any capacity whatsoever.) It goes without saying our Tar Heel Blue Blood Commissioner couldn't run a long turd if his life depended on it. I fully expect Vassar and Bryn Mawr to be admitted before he's through. John Swofford is to the Atlantic Coast Conference what Barack Hussein Obama is to the United States of America...'nuff said. But just consider, take away those great UCLA teams of John Wooden and the State of North Carolina has 11 NCAA basketball national championships, tied with Kentucky (in case you're wondering California has 15, all UCLA). The ACC as a league has 15 just behind the Pac 10 with 16 (in case you're wondering Oregon was the other school in 1939).


So, what's to be done? How can we make our league what it once was, and do it with integrity? In my view nothing... at least in terms of the ACC. But we can do something about what used to be referred to as the BIG FOUR.

A little history lesson for you Yankee blow-ins is in order. Back in the days when guys like Frank McGuire, Everett Case and Bones McKinney were building ACC basketball we used to have a holiday tournament called the Dixie Classic. It was a three day tournament at Christmas hosted by Wake, Duke, Carolina and State at Reynolds Coliseum. The best teams in the country were invited to play and believe me, NOBODY turned down an invitation! It was a basketball junkie's wet-dream. The best teams in the country all came down to Tobacco Road to play four schools located within minutes of each other. By the way, the tournament ran from '49 to '60 and not one year did a visiting team win. It cannot be denied, without the Dixie Classic the ACC wouldn't have happened.

OK, so what happened? Ever see the film Casino? Sam Rothstein is what happened. In those days
there was not a lot of home grown talent and most of our recruits came from big cities up north. A loose organization of "fixers" headed by Rothstein got to a couple of players on State and Carolina to shave some points and when things blew up the ever wise UNC system President Bill Friday pulled the plug. Rothstein was called before a House committee investigating organized crime's influence in college athletics and he took the fifth 37 times including as to whether he was right or left handed. UNC coach Frank McGuire bolted for the NBA leaving a fresh faced 30 year old kid in charge (some guy named Dean something or other) and NC State's Everett Case "retired" (he'd be dead of cancer soon, some say brought on by the shame and worry).

But that was then and this is now. The ACC/Big Ten "Challenge" is ho-hum, due in my view to the dilution of the league. Again, we can't do a helluva lot about ACC basketball but the Big Four we can. Let's get the Dixie Classic rolling again. In Raleigh we have the PNC Arena, we've got the Dean Dome, the Greensboro Coliseum and whatever the hell the Charlotte Coliseum is called these days. We could play games at a variety of venues with the final rotating. Can you imagine what bringing in teams like Kentucky or Kansas or west coast teams like Gonzaga would do for our recruiting? Can you imagine Kentucky saying no to a chance to play (and beat) Duke and North Carolina? Plus it would be the unofficial starting point for the whole NCAA basketball season. Everything prior would be considered "pre-season". The time has come, it's been 50+ years since the scandal. We NEED this tournament and so does college basketball.

Monday, December 29, 2014

Resolutions: 2014 Assessment, 2015 Debut

Here are the 2014 resolutions with assessment:

1.  Be there for my family more---especially for The Kitten.  Yes, but still not at the level it should be.
2.  Stop expecting things to happen around the house--do them, take ownership.  Yes.  Again, still needs more.
3.  Find some kind of volunteering opportunity that interests and energizes me.  Not really

4.  Be nicer and smile more-- No.  Probably went the other way.
5.  Continue to exercise regularly--very disappointing. No.  First six months were great; horrible since.
6.  Continue to count calories and manage what I eat--again, no.  Horrible last six months.
7.  Take at least one vacation of not less than two full weeks.  YES!
8.  Institute a "Shabat-like" avoidance of electronic media on Saturdays. First six months, yes, then no
9.  Read more (probably on Saturdays)--First six months yes, then no.
10.  Improve the state of the ManCave.  Absolutely not.


Ok, some resolutions for 2015:

1.  I endeavor to be less sarcastic/caustic/ironic.
2.  I will re-institute E-Shabat.  6PM Friday to 6PM Saturday
3.  I will take more of an interest in the yard/gardens
4.  I will finally get the gas fireplace installed in the bedroom
5.  I will eat more modestly.
6.  I will exercise more frequently
7.  After my hip replacement, I will work to be more physically flexible.
8.  I will take at least one vacation of not less than two full weeks.
9.  I will read more.
10.  I will play more golf.

2014 Results and 2015 Predictions

Here are my 2014 Predictions and the result.

1.  Republicans will pick up at least 23 seats in 2014---They gained 14
2.  Republicans will win back the Senate---Yes they Did!
3.  Nancy Pelosi will resign from her leadership position in the House Dem Caucus--No
4.  The strictures of Obamacare as applied to Employer provided plans will achieve full fetch this year, as tens of millions of people find out that their current plan is "non-compliant" and that the new menu from which they can choose includes only more expensive options.  This dooms Democrats in 2014--I"m gonna take a partial on this one.
5.  The stock market will be above 17,500 on 31 December 2014.--I think this will be correct.
6.  I will weigh less on 31 December 2014 than I do today (29 December 2013--178). Not by a long, long shot
7.  The Kansas City Chiefs will win  Super Bowl 48. Nope
8.  UVA Football will win seven games or more in 2014  Nope
9.  UVA Basketball will make the NCAA Tournament  Yep
10.  UVA Basketball will lose in the second round.  Nope--third round.

And here are my predictions for 2015

1.  Mitt Romney will be an active candidate for President on 31 December 2015
2.  The Supreme Court will deal at least one generally considered large setback to Obamacare.
3.  The market will not break 19,000 in 2015
4.  I will weigh not more than 182 lbs on December 31, 2015 (195.2 today)
5.  UVA's President will resign in 2015
6.  UVA Basketball will make it to the 2015 Final Four
7.  The national average for unleaded regular gasoline will be above $3.00 ($2.29 today)
8.  Unemployment will be above 6.0% on 31 December 2015 (5.8 today)
9.  There will be a coup in Venezuela.
10.  The Denver Broncos will win the Super Bowl, and Peyton Manning will retire immediately thereafter.
 
May the odds ever be in my favor.  

The Tragedy of James Fallows

Note:  This is cross-posted from its source on Information Dissemination.

James Fallows has written an important article for The Atlantic, "The Tragedy of the American Military" , one whose hosannas are currently lighting up the web.  There is in this piece, much to like, and much to praise.  I utterly agree with Mr. Fallows about the degree to which the society and its military have become estranged, and the implications this distance has had on policy.  We have created a ducal military made up of other people's children, and we applaud it unquestioningly out of a sense of both appreciation and guilt.  Recent elections that brought more and more vets into the Congress have modestly addressed the lack of military experience in that branch, but it remains a body hamstrung by its own cowardly inability to directly question the military and assumptions made about it. 

There is however, in Fallows' arguments the whiff--no, the stench--of irony and hypocrisy.  His arguments are not obviated, but he is an imperfect messenger for them.  Throughout this piece, we see a yearning from its author for days gone by, when the military looked more like the populace it served and when society's entertainments lampooned its military.  This gauzy time seems to have --for Fallows--prevented acquisition program nightmares and poor decisions to employ the military (both incorrect).  But to the extent that a closer relationship between the military and its parent society existed, Fallows completely misses the centrality that the draft played in supporting such a link.  I do not write today in favor of re-instituting the draft, only to raise the point that wistful yearnings for days long gone by need to analyze more closely the conditions that brought them about.  One cannot credibly assess this past time of civil/military relations without also acknowledging the draft's impact upon it.  Fallows does not do this, and it seems a giant error of omission.

But it is not an omission, it was an act of commission.  To have spoken of the impact, and to have ascribed importance--let alone centrality--to the draft in sustaining closer civil/military relations would repudiate the actions of the young James Fallows, who in 1969--with the aid and comfort of fellow students at Harvard-- including those studying to be doctors--willfully evaded the ongoing draft.  Fallows acknowledges the act in his Atlantic piece, which I applaud him for.   In fact, the link in the last sentence was provided by him in his Atlantic article. Fallows writes of the time:

"In the atmosphere of that time, each possible choice came equipped with barbs. To answer the call was unthinkable, not only because, in my heart, I was desperately afraid of being killed, but also because, among my friends, it was axiomatic that one should not be “complicit” in the immoral war effort. Draft resistance, the course chosen by a few noble heroes of the movement, meant going to prison or leaving the country. With much the same intensity with which I wanted to stay alive, I did not want those things either. What I wanted was to go to graduate school, to get married, and to enjoy those bright prospects I had been taught that life owed me."

Who could honestly blame the young Fallows for his fear of being killed?  I cannot.  Nor can I honestly say what I would have done in 1969.  My formative years were the early 80's, when Reaganism reigned and conformists (which I was,  and which Fallows appears to have been for his time), did not think like Fallows did.  Clearly, Fallows was conforming then to his cohort, and my decision to join the Navy reflected the values of mine.

We are not presented with the young Fallows in the Atlantic article, but the old one.  The one who has on many occasions owned up to his draft evasion and who continues to appear to believe that it was essential to his ability to "enjoy those bright prospects I had been taught that life owed" him.  I have no quibble with his decision then nor his pride in it now.  I do however, have a problem with his usual weather eye being turned blindly to how his actions and those of his friends and cohort at Harvard (and elsewhere) directly and substantially undermined the very system for which he now pines.  

Fallows has done a service here, raising a series of important questions.  His well-earned status as a writer and analyst guarantees that they will receive more emphasis, and for that I am grateful.  I only wish that he had more thoughtfully considered the conditions that created a system that he seems to have considered to be self-regulating, but which obviously was not. 

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Post-Christmas Analysis by the Hammer

Man I'm glad that's over! Look I like Christmas, I don't LOVE Christmas but I like it. This year is the first in a while when I felt like Sgt. Major was actually enjoying herself (somewhat). We've had some death and tragedy around the Holidays the past year or three that provided excitement of the kind nobody wants. But this year was different, a bit of a renaissance, and thank the Lord for it!
I honestly think it was the addition of two K-9's to the family. As you well know there are two kinds of people in this world, cat people and dog people. Sgt. Major was always a cat people. Now as for me I like cats fine as long as they're good at doing cat things...like catching varmints. But if they just lounge around waiting on the Meow Mix shedding all over every friggin' thing then we probably ain't gonna get on that well. We had a cat like that but he was a rescue, as in I feed the guy most of his life because my scumbag neighbors from the Virginia mountains (have I ever mentioned that mountain folk ain't worth two shits on their best day?) wouldn't and when they moved they had the gall to call us FROM THE ROAD "asking" if we'd like the cat! They better be glad I didn't answer the phone that day. Anyway, we took the cat of course and looked after him until he died at the ripe old age of twelve, but I digress. One of Sgt. Major's nurse buddies had a bunch of pups (her dog you idiot) and women being women they thought the photos were oh so "CUTE" and one thing led to another, the next thing I know I'm buying Purina Puppy Chow at Wally World. The point being (if I have a point) is that women need something to nurture (in my case a role fulfilled quite adequately by my local bartender) otherwise there's an unexplainable and certainly not always apparent void. A variant on the "empty nest" thing I guess you might say. My remedy, buying a Kama Sutra manual and some AstroGlide, didn't really deal with the issue (I knew it wouldn't but hey, I'm all about problem solving, must try everything). Anyway Gus and Sophie are part of the family now and well all love it.

Did you ever hear that song Merry Christmas From the Family? Of course you have. One of the nice things about Christmas is the parties, and the shit people will VOLUNTARILY tell you! I went to a wine and nibbles at CW's sister's house and it is so refreshing to learn that other people's families are just as petty and trifling and fecked up as me own. Don't get me wrong, most of the people there were absolutely lovely, but we've all got our family and as long as there have been families there always the "Their kids are wild and I know the younger one is gay" or the "She's a bitch, no way they're REAL!" kinda shit. In my own Norman Rockwell-esque family I haven't seen my niece in 15 years as my brother's wife of 29 years left him and moved in with her high school sweetheart which lasted all of three months and since they had just one daughter whom is a chip off the old "see-you-next-Tuesday" block the -itch took the daughter in the settlement...apparently. My poor brother (not the sharpest knife in the drawer) showed me photos of his grand kids (who don't seem to even know him) of whom he is allowed to see if he drives to High Point with adequate notice so the GRAND-BITCH HO HO HO FROM HELL is not around don't you know. Oh well, Merry Christmas From the Family.

That's about it. Oh, I have to apologize to CW. I went off on his ass for not calling me when he came down to Redneck country over the Holidays. He's an inconsiderate prick and my feelings were a little hurt (I'm very sensitive) but I was a little rough on him. Sorry CW, but I got you something REAL NICE for Santa Clause, a clothes horse! I know, a bit non-traditional but hey, I think it'll grow on you.

After Christmas Bitching from the Shore

There really is no time like the days between Christmas and New Years, especially when the calendar conspires to put Christmas on a Thursday. That said, this is a particularly busy time for me, as I have serious deadlines in two weeks and a debate to prepare for.  This means a lot of time in the ManCave bathed in the luminescence of my computer.

I had a nice chat with Brother Jim while visiting our ancestral shrine in Clayton, NC before Christmas, in which I complained about talked about the joy men must feel who leave their work on Friday afternoon and then do not again contemplate it until Monday morning, or Sunday evening at worst.  I realize that that men such as this are increasingly less common as computers allow many of us to be mobile in our jobs, and I also realize that men enjoying this kind of life are in many cases not terribly well compensated for their work. I realize that this discussion also involves women, but I spend very little time wondering about what women's lives are like.  I do find myself wondering about how other men live theirs.

That said, there does not exist a time in which there is not work to be done.  Always.  It never goes away.  I slip out to the movies yesterday to see "Unbroken" and find myself thinking about what I REALLY should be doing with the time.  I wake to the early breaking light at 0630 and hope against all hope that I can sleep for another hour, only to begin to plan my day and lay it out.  Once the fire is lit, there is no extinguishing it.  And so I drag my beswollen corpulence out of bed and head here to the ManCave, where I now find myself wondering why it is that I am writing this instead of working.

I simply cannot wait to be retired, to wake and have little that HAS to be done.  Rather my day would consist of a number of choices.  Do this?  Do that? Do anything?  Don't get me wrong, I think I have fifteen or so of the most productive years of my life ahead of me, and I have a lot to get done in that time.  But when it is time to hang it up, hang it up I will.  Some people who think they have visibility into my soul like to say, "Oh sure.  Keep talking.  You'll never stop working--you'll always be doing something".  They could not be more wrong.  I will be a spectacularly successful retiree.

I am become gigantic, like some kind of stuffed 19th century robber baron.  The orthopedic man's good deed in quickly scheduling my hip replacement (2 February, for those planning to attend the bedside vigil) caused me to say "what the hell" and commence a no exercise, yes eat plan that has me this very morning 1.2 pounds from the magic 200lbs mark, something I am avoiding like the plague in order not to give Brother Tom the one bullet he most desires.  I started another "Big Fat Bryan's Diet" yesterday, thinking that if I continued on the path I was on, a special surgical platform might be required for my impending procedure, which would invariably be covered by the local news and Ripley's Believe it or Not.

Not only am I fat, but I am also lame. My left hip grinds and stings with every movement, as if crying out for more attention in anticipation of its departure.  There is a noticeable hitch in my get-along, and most movements of any degree cause a wince.  A brutal movie, going to see "Unbroken" yesterday did give me some special diet inspiration, as the men's 47 day drift at sea reinforced the notion of losing weight without movement.  Perhaps I'll ask the kitten to rap me in the teeth with a large bamboo pole now and then to achieve even more of the diet's impact.

The big winners in my house this Christmas were the dogs, recipients of far too many doggie toys, most of which emit annoying whines under the pressure of canine canines.  Our kitchen currently looks like some kind of grotesque Jonestown massacre, with reindeer, mice, squirrels,  and other mammals splayed about in various states of defilement.  It is not enough to limp about in this space with dogs who take pleasure in jabbing the back of your knee with their noses; no, the added bonus of toy-like landmines waiting to ensnare the unsuspecting ankle only increases the fun.

New Year's Eve approaches, a night my father wisely refers to as "amateur night", and a night that I have taken little pleasure in over the years, though Prague 2000/2001 was memorable in a "not for family reading" sort of way.  We generally tend to gather with a couple of couples for dinner and then await the bewitching hour as our eight communal children wreak havoc around us.  Around 2200, I have been known to take my leave and head home to bed, though I occasionally make it into the New Year.  Our companions on New Years are great people, and I wish we spent more time with them.  One of them was in my dorm first year at UVA, and it was through his tipsy wife (also UVA) at the June 2007 UVA reunion that I came to be introduced to The Kitten.  The other couple has UVA in their pedigree too, as he went to law school there.  Their meeting is Obama-like, in that I believe he was assigned as an intern or first year lawyer at a firm in which she was already established.

I am not yet ready to make my 2015 predictions, or post my 2015 resolutions.  Perhaps tomorrow.  I do know that my "E-Sabbath" idea, something I practiced through the first half of the year and then abandoned, is likely to return in 2015.  Logically speaking, if there is always, always work to be done, then not doing it for a day really shouldn't matter, right?





Friday, December 26, 2014

Big Fat Friday Free For All

What's the matter folks?  Didn't get that rotocoptor that you really wanted?  Had your golf game interrupted by a police funeral?  Can't figure out how that new sound system works?

Kvetch, friends, and do it here!


Wednesday, December 24, 2014

Merry Christmas!

Luke 2:1-20King James Version (KJV)

And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be taxed.
(And this taxing was first made when Cyrenius was governor of Syria.)
And all went to be taxed, every one into his own city.
And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David:)
To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
10 And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
12 And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
14 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.
15 And it came to pass, as the angels were gone away from them into heaven, the shepherds said one to another, Let us now go even unto Bethlehem, and see this thing which is come to pass, which the Lord hath made known unto us.
16 And they came with haste, and found Mary, and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger.
17 And when they had seen it, they made known abroad the saying which was told them concerning this child.
18 And all they that heard it wondered at those things which were told them by the shepherds.
19 But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.
20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things that they had heard and seen, as it was told unto them.

Friday, December 19, 2014

A Hissy Fit For Hell

Since the midterm elections the left has been all a twitter! They're pissed that they did so poorly in the midterm elections, they're feeling rejected and now apparently they're in the second stage of grief, ANGER. Of course they have only themselves to blame. The economy is limping along like a broke-dick dog, the debt is through the roof, unemployment is at depression levels and 2.8 billion people are on food stamps (or would be if they could only get here). The world is a much MUCH more dangerous place and the US is starting to get pushed around in just about every region. I expect Venezuela to invade Florida just about any day now. Don't misunderstand, most of these events and outcomes were planned. What's got the Dem's tighty-whities in a knot is that nobody appreciates their efforts, except their brilliant and beautiful leftist looney-tune base. So in the spirit of rewarding their most loyal friends and punishing the reactionary, rightwing knuckle draggers, it's time to do some stuff.

First amnesty: Come one come all. As long as you didn't make the papers in the US don't be worrying about that child molestation thing back in El Salvador. Besides it was your cousin and anyway that was like eight years ago hombre. That's an OLD crime, can't be worried about that shit!
The President's goal is to get 15 to 20 million illegals on the fast track to citizenship and in the voting booth. The illegals strategy worked out wonderfully for California and Obama is taking it nationwide. If successful there won't be another Republican elected at the federal level for 200 years and the Constitution will be deader than Pancho Villa. The thing is just gringo bullshit anyway. Oh, have to give a shout-out to Boehner and the Chamber of Commerce. Who knew suicide could be so much fun? ¿Te gusta las manzanas?

Second: Empty Guantanamo. This was a campaign promise made by our "smartest President ever" and he's following through. Never mind that Chuck Hagel kicked up (and got kicked out) or that the Pentagon says dozens of the parolees are now fighting for ISIS (NOT Al Queda mind you, Obama destroyed them don't you know). Most of these guys are just confused kids anyway. They're good boys, just got a little mixed up and started hanging out in the wrong bazaar. They'll be ok, if we can only find a country willing to take them. But a word to the wise, don't let them near matches.

Third (and CW's favorite): Normalize relations with Cuba. And why not! We've tried that isolation thing for decades, hasn't accomplished dick. Why should we let the Europeans have all the fun with what Fidel described as "the cleanest" 15 year old prostitutes in the whole wide world. Now please, I don't want to hear about the alleged crimes of the alleged Stalinist regime with tales of firing squads, tiger cages and sweltering tropical dungeons. Who cares? That's in the past. Besides, they have the greatest healthcare system on the planet...AND IT'S FREE! Just ask Michael Moore. But I'm still a bit confused why Fidel had to have Spanish doctors save his life a few years back. Cuba's best and brightest must have been on a state sponsored holiday to Nice or something.
Oh, in the unconfirmed rumor department I hear Obama plans to release Charlie Manson soon. The reason being we've kept him locked up for 40+ years and it has accomplished nothing! If we want to affect Charlie's behavior we need to "normalize" our relationship with him and then we might actually have some leverage. Regardless, keeping him locked up hasn't worked.

Oh yeah, here's a fun fact: During the Batista dictatorship there were 11 prisons in Cuba, now there are over 300. Now there's progress for you!

Jeb's Big Day

Former Florida Governor Jeb Bush has announced formally that he is interested in "actively explore(ing) the possibility" of running for President, which is in essence, a non-announcement as we already knew he was doing so.  This has the the chattering classes chattering, and so as not to be left out, here's a little chatter from me.

1.  Jeb Bush was generally considered a good conservative governor of a large, key, state.  It has been some years since he last ran for office (2002, I believe), but back in the late nineties, even within the Bush Family HE was considered the one most likely to someday be President.  I stress to you my own perception that Bush was INDEED considered a conservative when he governed--not by the standards many now apply to that term--but by the standards that were au currant when he was in office.  Stories such as this one are out there for the reading, ones written in Florida by people who remember, and they don't see Jeb as anything but a conservative.

2.  But...a lot has changed since he last ran for office (2002).  For one, his brother was President, twice, and he governed in a way that turned many people off (certainly not me).  Additionally, Jeb has taken some positions on major issues that rankle many conservatives.  His advocacy of "common core" is front and center, but as this article demonstrates clearly, what many people object to have been what local school districts have done (unwisely) in implementing common core.  Common core has NEVER been a curriculum...rather, it was supposed to be a set of standards.  These silly math problems we've seen throughout the media are NOT common core, so much as they are the work of ridiculous educators seeking to alter the pedagogical landscape. Additionally, Jeb's stance on immigration ("an act of love") has many conservatives in a tizzy.  Here's a recent look at what he's said on the subject, and as many of you have already guessed, I'm ok with this approach.  Where I am not open to compromise is in sequencing.  I want the borders closed.  Period. End of story.  And I want us to figure out how to integrate those here already--illegally--who have legitimate roots and lives here.

3.  I'm just not sure how likable Jeb is.  I haven't been in his company, but I don't get overwhelming vibes that suggest I'd like to spend a few hours in a goose blind with the guy.  I want my President to be earnest and serious....but I also want to believe he/she is capable of laughter and joy.  I haven't seen this side of Jeb.

4.  I'm not sure he's burning with the fire to be President.  And in order to be elected President, I
believe one needs this.

5.  The "not another Bush" thing.  Here's how I feel about that--I have no objection to family political dynasties in the United States, because WE ultimately are making the choices, not the dynasts.  That said, I will only tolerate this argument from Republicans or those likely to vote Republican.  You can't whine about dynasties while driving your Prius with a "Ready for Hillary" bumper sticker on it.

Would I support Jeb as the GOP nominee?  Without reservation.  For those interested, here is my listing in priority order of those Republicans mentioned as potential Presidential candidates.  My criteria are: 1) the degree of affinity I have for the idea of this person being President and 2) the sense I have that they can be elected to the office. Also, I have sorta picked and chosen among those I think are considering the run.

1.  Mitt Romney--by far my favorite.
2.  Paul Ryan
3.  John Kasich
4.  Jeb Bush
5.  Scott Walker
6.  Bobby Jindal
7.  Mike Pence
8.  Chris Christie
9.  Rand Paul
10.  Ted Cruz

What are you folks thinking?  What would your list be?  What would your list be using MY criteria?


Let's Talk About Cuba

Fidel Castro 
Yesterday I went back and forth with a Facebook friend over Cuba, and it is worth sharing.

 Gregorius Caroline du Nord I don't believe in doing business with ANY totalitarian state under ANY circumstances. WE should have invaded the place in the 90's when Russia was on it's ass and established a Democratic Republic, then put Castro on trial and let the Cuban people decide what to do with him. But we were too busy building China to the detriment of our own people and industry so as to appease leftists and traitorous business interests. Remember what Marx said, classes from different countries have more in common with each other than with other classes within their own country.
December 17 at 11:03pm · Edited · Like

Gregorius Caroline du Nord "We have had better relations with far worse regimes"
Name one CW. They don't come any worse than Cuba.
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Bryan McGrath China through the 1970's. The Soviet Union throughout much of its history. There's two.
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord Bullshit! They were not "far worse" by any stretch of the imagination.
Where do you get your info on Cuba, George Clooney?
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Bryan McGrath No; not at all. And it is stunning to read you give two of the world's most brutal police states such a pass...
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord A pass? No way Jose (or should I say Fidel). The Cuban model was the Soviet model...two peas in a pod. The Chinese were different, but just as brutal.
My point is Cuba is a totalitarian dictatorship with all the mass killings, etc. and for you to say we've dealt with "far worse" is sophistry. I love you brother but you got your head up your ass on this one.
23 hrs · Edited · Like


Bryan McGrath Let's do a thought experiment, Gregorious. Let's think about China, today. China is still a totalitarian regime, but would you not consider it FAR less so than under Mao? Do you not think economic normalization played a role in it? Another point....Ronaldus Maximus used a similar argument to the one Obama is using when he advocated engaging the South African regime under apartheid. Drove the Libs crazy. Isn't there some possibility that isolating isn't as effective as we'd like to think?
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord I appreciate that. But the voice of reason and probity stepped up and got things under control. Headmaster Bryan.
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord Well under Mao and Zhou Enlai China was a much more volatile state that's for sure. But the idea that a communist dictatorship can become all warm and fuzzy is absurd. China today is a thousand times more dangerous than the pre-Nixon/Kissinger China.
Give me 50 bucks and a day or two and I'll put together a fact sheet for you, you can show it off at some conference or war college.
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Bryan McGrath I'm probably at least as realistic when it comes to China as you (remember what I do for a living), and no one sees them as fuzzy. As for more dangerous, you are spot on. But that isn't the question. The question is whether or not economic liberatlization has created additional freedom in China over and above what it had before. They may still suck, but do they suck less? This is what I'm suggesting will happen with Cuba. In fact, I think the regime is going to be overwhelmed.
23 hrs · Like · 1

Gregorius Caroline du Nord South Africa was a different animal altogether. Different set of circumstances with different resolutions.
Let me ask you this, is South Africa a better place now than thirty years ago?
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Bryan McGrath I can't say for sure. I tried to assess this two years ago when I visited. For white people, it is assuredly not. But they don't comprise a majority. Crime is rampant, that is for sure. But I imagine that for the average black South African, things are better. Whether it was a different situation isn't important. What was important was a leader who believed that engaging a screwed up regime worked better than isolating. Let's look at our two wonderful, sixty year examples of isolation--Cuba and North Korea. How's that working for us? For them?
23 hrs · Like

Gregorius Caroline du Nord No I think China is a modern feudal state. The elites control the economy and there's very little mobility of any kind.
Look. it's not that difficult to get huge growth rates with an economy like China's. If I've got 5 bucks in year one and make 10 bucks in year two, I've got a 100% growth rate. But what drive an economy is innovation, and China has none. Everything they have they've either stolen or bought (mostly stolen). Their model with their problems (and they have tons) is unsustainable.
23 hrs · Like

Bryan McGrath I have only limited quibbles with this; but the question remains whether or not economic liberalization has created MORE freedom in China. This is a relative measure.
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord Here's the thing CW, North Korea and Cuba are criminal regimes. And like criminals they should be isolated. If we don't have to do business with them we shouldn't, keep them marginalized and in "jail".
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Bryan McGrath While their populations suffer?
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Gregorius Caroline du Nord More wealth for the elites and yes some has trickled down. But so what? My priority is not the Chinese people. My priority is protecting freedom because free people don't start trouble. China is an ascending power and a huge problem...and we created them.
23 hrs · Like

Gregorius Caroline du Nord If their populations suffer it's not my doing. I want to help but if helping the people of North Korea means giving aid and assistance to criminal mass murderers then sorry, not gonna happen.
23 hrs · Like

We left it there.  There is a lot to his position, and I realize it is more consistent with a center-right view of the world.  But I've always thought our policy toward Cuba was non-sensical, that we could steamroll that regime with capitalism if we just gave it a chance.  It looks like maybe we will get an opportunity to test the theory.  But my interlocutor's point is a good one--there is something to our nation's having stood up to totalitarian police states--so my advocacy of throwing the rudder over on this issue is made with some reservation.

Big Fat Friday Free For All

Hey, friend.  Chin up.  Don't let the blues get you down. I know it hurts to see the US drop its grudge against Cuba.  I know you're not happy about Jeb Bush getting in the race.  I know you really, really wanted to see "The Interview".

Let it out.  Tell us the whole story....

Off midday to the Big City with all three Kittens for dinner, a show, overnight, and shopping.  Return tomorrow and finally put up the tree, then up Sunday morning to head to NC to see the Southern branch of the McGrath Clan.


Sunday, December 14, 2014

On Shooting a Deer

Fifty weeks ago, I spent an afternoon in a freezing tree stand at Mudge's place in Accomack County on Virginia's Eastern Shore and shot AT a deer. That tale is recounted in this ditty posted soon thereafter.  I returned this past Friday to another afternoon/morning hunt and an evening of friendship in between with the Mudge's.  For the faint of heart among you, this post tells the story of a successful deer hunt, so if you don't want to read about it, please stop here and return to the Kardashians.

The day did not start out in a manner suggesting good fortune.  Mudge is about 2.5 hours south of me, and I had a morning appointment here in Easton (massage, monthly) to dispatch before making the trip.  Knowing that I would emerge from the morning's appointment smelling like I just walked out of the Mustang Ranch, I programmed a quick trip home for a shower.  This I did, packing up the things I needed for the night and a small token of esteem for the Mudge's.  Ten miles down the road, The Kitten called to tell me that I had left the token and my bag sitting in the kitchen, so I turned around to begin the journey again.

Additionally, I had not eaten and I needed gas, so on the second time around, I figured I'd hit the WaWa in Cambridge, fuel up and grab a soft pretzel.  Brother Tom introduced me to the Wawa soft pretzel, and I must admit, they are devine divine really good.  So I stopped, got the pretzel and started driving again....without getting gas.  So I had to stop yet again.  Keep in mind, It was now nearing an hour after I originally left home and I was sixteen miles down the road.

I eventually arrived at Mudge's place and we shot the breeze for a while before heading a mile or so down the road to his hunting grounds.  Before walking down the paths to our stands, Mudge suggested that we "sight in" my field piece with a few rounds.  This year I switched from buckshot to a slug round, and I wanted to get an idea of how decent a shot I was. Now, I am no Fred Sheehy, but I have always been a decent shot.  We confirmed this with three rounds, two from about 30 yards and one from about 80 yards, all of which were decently aimed.

It was 3:15 or so before we got up into our stands, so there wasn't a whole lot of daylight left.  This was ok, because while it wasn't terribly cold, I had my real foul weather stuff packed away for the
The Sight Line
next morning. In fact, I climbed up in a pair of tan corduroys which few would consider appropriate hunting wear.  Additionally, what cold there was was whipped about a bit by a steady breeze.

My stand sits about 12 feet above a wide path or road that Mudge cut with his back hoe.  Because I am right handed, the barrel points in the direction indicated in the photo above.  Realistically, my arc of fire is about 270 Relative to about 020 relative to my position along the path, but there are very dense woods in all but the clear bit you see above.  There are a few open patches in that 110 degrees other than the path, but not very many.  The road continues to the right, but the machinations involved in switching my position and the gun barrel to shoot to the right would alert only the deafest of deer. So in reality, if I were to shoot at the deer, it would be in the road clearing out to 90 or 100 yards.

So I sat down in my stand and began the patient wait.  As I said, the wind was steady, so there was a good bit of wind generated noise.  I don't hear well as it is, and I take my hearing aids out when I hunt.  The hat in the picture above, when down over my ears really muffled a lot of sound, so I had to roll it up to uncover my pitiful ear-holes.  This made hearing easier, but added to the slight discomfort caused by the cold.

Keep in mind, I am pretty damn sure that the ONLY way that I would get a good shot at a deer is down this road, but that didn't keep me from looking as far as 090 relative, where I could not possibly get a shot, but where a clueless deer might be walking down the path toward me.  This eventuality is very unlikely, but it gets boring looking straight down one direction, so I occasionally rotated my head and body to the right to see what would be down there.

The sun began to fade, and I estimated that I had about five more minutes before I'd climb down and head back to Mudge's truck--which was off to the right, and in which direction I was shifted when I made this calculation.  And that's when I heard it--rustling in the woods close-by, on my port quarter.  I began the slow, quiet shift around, one made necessary by my unnecessarily having shifted to the right, and of course, alerted the deer that had come up behind me not more than 15 yards away in the thick woods.  Had I not been lollygagging to starboard, the deer would have walked from left to right across the road very close to me and would have been an easy shot.  As I turned, it heard me and bounded back into the woods.  But....sixty yards or so down the path stood a pretty doe, right in the middle of the road.  I now was shifted to port, and in good position.  She didn't appear to be in a hurry, so I leveled the Benelli and sighted her in....the little red/orange bead at the end of the barrel was now very difficult to see in the fading light, but just enough of it was visible to give me the confidence to take the shot.  Flashing through my mind were the same thoughts as last year.  How would I react if I pull the trigger and it actually hits the deer? I've never shot and killed a deer.  I wondered if there would be remorse.

I squeezed the trigger, the gun responded, and the doe dropped where she stood, motionless.  I sat and contemplated her for a second, committing the exact spot where she was to memory in case she got up and moved. Having figured out that I did not have remorse, I realized that if she got up and walked away, injured, there would be little time and daylight left to find her. Then I would be very remorseful.   But she was not moving.  She wasn't going anywhere.

I slowly got myself together for the climb down the stand.  I knew that by now, Mudge would be leaving his stand to see what happened (it turns out that he was climbing down when he heard my shot).  I quickly policed my restraint strap and the lifting line and made the stand ready for the morning's hunt, and then I began the walk to my first deer.  Honestly, I felt good about it.  I realize many would not agree, and some would find borderline mental illness in feeling this way, but I felt good.  I was patient. I was accurate.  I had done what I set out to do.

My first deer--100lb doe
I arrived upon the animal and she was dead.  I shot her on a broad starboard bow angle, and the slug entered her body just aft of the front right shoulder.  It traveled through her heart and lungs and exited on her port quarter near the bottom of her rib cage.  Mudge arrived on the scene and I could honestly tell that he was just as happy about the event as I was.  Actually, he may have even been happier, as that is the kind of guy he is.  Mudge pronounced her a "pretty, healthy doe" and estimated her weight at 110 pounds (she was 100 on the nose when weighed later).  Of great interest to me was his pronouncement that doe taste better, and that as healthy as she was, she would be delicious eating.

Mudge suggested we go get his truck and drive her out--I offered to stay with her, and he answered plainly "she's not going anywhere".  So we headed off, drove slowly back and put her in the bed of the truck to take her back to Mudge's field cleaning station.  I won't go into the details of the cleaning, but I will extend serious gratitude to Mudge for not only doing it, but for carefully explaining each step along the way.  There is an art to getting a deer ready for taking to processing, and while it was a cold night (making haste unnecessary), getting it done quickly and efficiently takes great skill.  Once she was dressed, we headed back to Mudge's to clean up for dinner, drove ourselves and the deer to nearby Exmore to the processing facility, and then met Mrs. Mudge for dinner at a local restaurant.

I chose a gumbo for dinner, perhaps an unwise decision, as I am sure its gaseous by-products had something to do with nary the sight nor sound of a deer coming near me the next morning.  But an evening of great conversation with the Mudge's followed by warm slumber made the next morning's shutout well worthwhile.

Below is a shot of Mudge and Oscar, saying goodbye as I backed out for the drive home.  I had done what I set out to do--and that was renew my friendship with a truly great fellow and his wife.  That I had shot my first deer was simply icing on the cake.




Mudge and Oscar

Friday, December 12, 2014

Big Fat Friday Free For All

What's got you down, Chumley?  Your emails making racial jokes about the President get hacked by the North Koreans?  Your feature article in Rolling Stone turn out not the way you planned?  Get it off your chest...share with us.  We'll listen.

Heading off to the wilds of the Eastern Shore of Virginia in a few hours to experience the sublime friendship and hospitality of Mudge.  Spend a little time in the tree stand this afternoon and tomorrow morning, with some time by the woodstove tonight.  Good times.

Cheers, folks.


Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Psychotic Ramblings from a Diseased, Alcohol Sodden Brain

Am I stupid? Well the facts are irrefutable, I must be! I keep falling for the Republican's bullshit and end up contributing my time and money to our "cause" and in the end the establishment just keeps Jujitsu-ing my ass into a top-rope Flying Brain Chop takedown for the pinfall.
You remember they told us yeah sure we worked with Democrats to get Thad Cochran through the primary down in Missississippi, we had to. We didn't want a Tea Party guy nominated, he couldn't get elected. Of course if one absolutely had to have a Tea Party candidate can you think of a better State to run the guy in than Missississippi? The Tea Party dude woulda won going away, ask Mary Landrieu! But the fact is the Establishment pricks would have preferred the Democrat.
To prove it I refer you to Ken Cuccinelli in Virginia. Do you think maybe he could have won the Governor's race against friggin' Terry the Clinton ass lick if just a little RNC cash had come his way? Cuccinelli would have won by 8 points.
Now here we go with the omnibus budget bill to fund every Goddamn piece-of-shit Obama program for the better part of next year. Forget about the fact that the budget process has been a shame for years. Forget about the fact the government has been living off continuing resolutions since before Harry Reid had pubbs. Now all of a sudden the Democrats want to lock in a budget for as long as they can...HUGE SURPRISE! But Boehner decides "wow, gee, we don't have the votes right now so what should we do Nancy?"
So if I understand this right, the Republicans ran on stopping Obamacare, the insane immigration surrender and every little leftist law and regulation these socialist pricks have instituted these past six years, but now, during lame-duck sessions the Republicans decided to give away the farm and lock Dem policies in place for at least a year? My God in Heaven! And I though Obama pussied out in Iraq!

This UVA thing is disturbing but sadly not at all surprising. As you may know Tickbite ain't that far from Durham and a similar fiasco not so long ago. Due to the luck of proximity I had the benefit of national as well as local coverage of the Duke Lacrosse thing. Now I'm no genius (I have mentioned that before haven't I?) but I do have special insight into the leftist/liberal mind (it's a gift). I'm usually, not 100% mind you, but I'm usually never wrong when it comes to ferreting out their motives. I was very vocal from the beginning that Duke Lacrosse was all a pack of lies. No way a bunch of white boys would rape a nasty friggin' stripper, especially Crystal Mangum. She has all the sex appeal of a...well I won't go there. But it was obvious, a skank ho looking to "get paid" versus a bunch of La Costa wearing Ivy Leaguers (or their reasonable equivalent). I just could not see them shagging that, much less rape! Plus how do you go about raping someone like Crystal Mangum? Gee, if that's what you're into offer her a pack of Kools and climb aboard, why get involved in a fight? She'd probably kick your ass anyway. Now Beyonce maybe, I could see that (not rape but...you know). Skank-ass Crystal Mangum? Forgetaboutit, way way WAY too ghetto!
Anyway, back to the point. The fraternity slandered in this UVA thing should take legal action against the accuser, Rolling Stone magazine and every publication involved in spreading this malicious lie. The Chancellor of UVA needs to lift the suspension of sororities and fraternities and cut out the feminist drivel emanating from her fat pie-hole. She's given lip service to the fact that this was all made up bullshit but she's acting as if it were true. If she doesn't get her mind right then guys like CW should put some pressure on the university and see about firing the halfwit. She is not doing the students, the alumni nor the reputation of this absolute powerhouse of an academic institution any favors with her politically correct sanctions (it may be a lie but we KNOW the narrative is correct...and nows our chance). These school administrators have to be held accountable! At Duke Brodhead wasn't, the gang of 80+ leftist professors who hung the lacrosse players out to dry weren't, and that was fundamentally unjust. Nows OUR chance, get 'er done CW.

Did you see that North Carolina is 6th in teachers having illicit sex with students? We had one carpet-munching teacher (not that there's anything wrong with that) who had the student's name tattooed on her arm! Now that's some brazen shit is it not? I swear every time I turn around some phys ed instructor is getting busted for banging some 16 year old. But during the Hagan/Tillis campaign the NCAE was all about how the teachers were "professionals" and how they were mistreated, used and abused and of course HORRIBLY underpaid. Well correct me if I'm wrong, but don't professional organizations police themselves? Don't doctors police other doctors, lawyers lawyers etc.? Since when has a teacher's union policed anything? They're the ones getting lawyers for these pedos running rampant in our schools.

Well that's it, I'm outta scotch so must be time to go.

Sunday, December 7, 2014

The Hammer's College Football Round-Up: The Final Four

Well it's over, at least until January 15. The final four teams were just announced and it went just like everyone expected, like it had to be. Baylor and TCU are both excellent teams and arguably better than one or two of the teams actually selected, but that's not ALL that this thing is about.

But let's come back to that. Ohio State got in after a very impressive showing against a lackluster, phone-it-in, I don't want to be here Wisconsin Badger squad in the Big Ten Championship game in Indianapolis. How in the world can a nationally ranked team go into a championship game and get humiliated 59 zip? I'm not surprised they lost but Wisconsin was not ready to play, which I find incomprehensible.
Q: Coach going into this game you were 10-2 and 7-1 in the Big Ten. You started the year by blowing an 11 point fourth quarter lead down in Baton Rouge, eventually losing to LSU 24-13. You came out today and your team showed no intensity or focus. You've obviously found the "off" switch, are you still looking for the "on".
A: MAMA!!

The FSU vs Ga. Tech game in Charlotte (The Queen City) was actually better than I thought it would be. None of this dicking around this time for the Semiholes, they came out smoking...and so did Tech. The Jackets played as good as they know how, that triple option was clicking and a quarter in it was clear this would be a scoring contest....first mistake loses. Well Ga. Tech blinked first in the second and although the game was still very much in question, everybody had the feeling the die was cast.

Alabama did what they were expected to do against a quality Missouri team and Oregon got a little payback against Arizona. Big friggin' whoop!

So who got in and why. 'Bama, Oregon and FSU were in as long as they won, and they did. I've heard a bunch of talk how FSU was a "bubble" team. Bubble my ass. There guy's ain't lost a game since Florida in 2012, they're the defending National Champions, and a bunch of suits are gonna keep them out of the playoffs? Kiss my ass! Whoever thought up that line of bullshit needs to go into politics.

The question and controversy is who gets the four spot, Ohio State, Baylor or TCU? Here's my take.
If I were a conspiracy theorist I'd probably be thinking old Jim Delaney had a word with the Wisconsin AD (Delaney is a Carolina guy after all). You KNOW the Big Ten would forever and for all time be mortified if they did not have a team in the first playoff. It would strike such a bitterness in their hearts it would be like the Treaty of Versailles for a German. So who knows what actually happened, but Wisconsin losing in the manner they did, which is EXACTLY what OSU had to have, well it just stinks, stinks like a week old rat on your front porch in June. That's all I have to say.
TCU? No way. They lost to Baylor head to head and yesterday they beat a woeful Iowa State. Conversely Baylor beat Kansas State, a team that beat Oklahoma on the road, Texas, Ok St and WVU at Morgantown. Man I love TCU's offense, but you gotta go with Baylor in a matchup.

So, in my view Baylor got screwed, blued and tattood. But hey brotherman, SOMEBODY is gonna get fuqed so everything is everything. Anybody with half a brain knew everybody wanted Ohio State. The Buckeyes can generate interest, pull those TV numbers. Baylor and TCU...in the minds of sports fans they are regional teams little better than the Richmond Spiders or Southern Miss. Look I'm just saying, I think Baylor should be there but I don't have a huge problem with Ohio State. But to the casual fan Ohio State means something, the Horny Frogs or the Baylor whatchamacallems don't.

Well that's it, I might post a little something after the playoff unless there's some drama in the mean time. It's been real and it's been nice, it just ain't been real nice. Now get outta my face bitch!
Oh shit, almost forgot. My pick to win it all?


Saturday, December 6, 2014

It's Like Watching Cars

Do you ever get the feeling you're watching Cars, or Flushed Away or Up in a theatre full of kids? Good Grief, just what the hell are you talking about Hammer! Well to start with I've seen those movies and I like them, not exactly Citizen Kane or Ernest Saves Christmas but mildly entertaining in a grammar school kind of way. No what I'm talking about is the media, the culture...the whole of American society. As a people we are so friggin' ignorant these days. We (again as a people) have little knowledge of our history (what we do know is usually wrong) we have no critical thinking skills to speak of and sadly most of us are loving every minute of it, could not care less. The fact that a man like Barack Obama can be elected President not once but TWICE tells you all you need to know.

Ignorance is the most dangerous thing in the world. Ignorance breeds stupidity, sloth, jealousy, envy and ultimately violence and destruction. Given enough time ignorance will turn us into slaves to be manipulated at the whim of any oppressor. We will become the mob, and if history proves anything it's that whatever comes after the mob is death. As evidence I offer the French Revolution (otherwise known as the Terror) or the Bolshevik Revolution, which showed the French how it's done (although the guillotine was a nice touch). I believe that is what's happening to us now.

Lord knows I'm no genius., but as I've said before I've got a pretty good "bullshit-o-meter"(usually). When I see things like Barack Obama touting the wonderful jobs numbers released yesterday 321,000 JOBS ADDED IN NOVEMBER,  and the media falling all over themselves with near rapture at the news, and seemingly the American public buying every Goddamned lying word of it, well as I said, it's like I'm watching a Pixar marathon matinee at the Parasitiformes Center for the Performing Arts Cinema Multiplex Complex. I'm being swept along by an emotionally driven narrative beyond my control in which reason and facts have no discernible impact whatsoever. Try telling a six year old Mater ain't for real.

"Hey Dad, wonder what Lighting McQueen is doing right now?" 

Friday, December 5, 2014

Big Fat Free For All Friday (CW in San Diego hanging out on yachts edition).

CW is off on the left coast doing his "I'm a defense strategist/genius and you ain't" thing so once again it's left to a dumb Redneck to do HIS job. But that's ok, I don't mind. Rednecks been covering for Yankees since the founding of this great nation (the intellectual horsepower provided by toothless Southern scum I might add). So let's get started.
What's on your mind? In New York City and can't afford thirteen bucks for a pack of Newports and "loosies" appear to be no longer available? Had a close encounter with a gang of white police officers and got yourself put in a choke-hold at the direction of a BLACK FEMALE supervising cop who happened to be just off camera? Got yourself put on Governor Cuomo's "Cigarette Strike Force" person-of-interest list due to that raging nicotine jones you got going on?
Please, free associate, we be here to help.

Sunday, November 30, 2014

The Hammer's College Football Review: Week 14

I know, this probably reminds you of that lap-dance you get every time the squeeze visits her sister in Pittsburg. But this ain't Scores or Leave it to Beavers, no friends it's Kenan Stadium yesterday where the NC State Wolfpack gave those cheaten' scumbags from Carolina a well deserved thumping for the ages. Carolina was never in the game, a rout from start to finish and it couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of guys. But hey, we all feel bad for these young, nubile Physics majors (yeah right), and in their heart of hearts I know they wish they were Wolf Pack-ettes. I can tell because they're in the Wolf-Style position already.
Go to Hell Carolina!

Gosh, I feel so much better now! Ok, now on to REAL college football. Gee, sorry, one more thing before we get started, UVA blew it against arch-rival Virginia Polytechnic to put the cherry on top of their shit sundae of a season. Plus Mike London still has his gig! Dark days in Charlottesville and more to come I'm afraid. They got some issues up there I'm sure you're aware of, and they got nothing to do with sports. Good luck UVA, but if somebody screwed up just come clean, don't take the "Carolina way".

Ok, well we had a barn burner last evening in Tuscaloosa (they must not do Birmingham anymore). 'Bama's defense got smoked for 600+ yards and they still won the game! Auburn left a lot of points on the table with eight trips to the red-zone producing only two touchdowns (the Tide were five for five). But answer me this sports fans, has there ever been a team that plays .500 ball in their conference but could (and everybody agrees on this) beat anybody in the country on any given day? What team in college football would be more than a three point favorite against Auburn be it Oregon, Ohio State, any-damn-body? Auburn may very well lose to Oregon or Ohio State (hitting on all cylinders) but they would destroy Arizona or Arizona State, Wisconsin and any team in the ACC apart from FSU. I sound like a War Eagle fan and I'm not, I'm just saying this is a GREAT team with consistency problems, look for them next year!

Speaking of Ohio State, poor Urban Meyer must be in the Jack Black after yesterday. His second string quarterback JT Barrett has done a bang-up job but got his leg banged up pretty bad yesterday, good-bye season. Meyer has one game to prove he can get production out of a untried and untested Cardale Jones. The guy is supposedly a freak of nature so who knows? But Coach knows it'll be hard for the selection committee to give OSU a spot if they ain't got a quarterback. Wisconsin is certainly good enough to beat the Buckeyes whomever is quarterback, so we'll see. Better give this kid some reps Coach!

Ole Miss and Missississippi State went to war in Oxenforda yesterday and Bo Wallace had an ok game. I really like this guy, he's got a quick release (just like me or so says the wife) and a cannon for an arm but his accuracy sucks. If he could hit a bear in the ass with a bass fiddle just 50% of the time he'd be the second coming of Joe Namath. When he's on Ole Miss can beat anybody (ask Alabama) but it's always a 50/50 proposition. Anyway the Mississippi teams are done.

So, I know we have conference championship games next week but at this stage who's looking good? I'd have to say Oregon. They lost to Arizona back in early October but man I just don't see that happening again. Simply put they're a better team. So my first pick is Oregon.
Alabama will destroy Misery in my opinion. Look, Missouri ain't played nobody! They lost to Indiana for Pete's sake! Georgia destroyed them 34 zip and out of all those wins there's maybe three or four half-ass good teams (Arkansas, Texas A&M, South Carolina). Racking up Ws against Toledo and South Dakota State ain't gonna get 'er done against the Crimson Tide looking the trophy. Missouri is done, 'Bama is in.
Florida State of course. They win ugly but they win often. No way in hell Georgia Tech can hang! I love Tech's triple option offense but FSU will cut up that defense like a Christmas turkey.
So who gets the four spot, Ohio State, TCU or Baylor? Well that's the 64,000 dollar question ain't it? If Ohio State makes a good showing with their new quarterback (see above) well they're in. The selection committee wants a Big 10 school, the TV folks want it so hey, if it's a toss up OSU is good to go. But if they loose or look like shit I'd have to go with TCU. The Horny Frogs got a wicked offense that puts up numbers faster than Obama's debt clock. Look I know they stumbled against Baylor this year, and I wouldn't have a problem with Baylor getting in, I just think TCU is the better team. But what the hell do I know?

Well that's it, let's see how it shakes out. Now please, just leave me the hell alone.

Going Back to Cali....Cali...Cali....

In is almost seven in the morning, and I am sitting in the United lounge in Terminal D at Dulles, having arrived here a few minutes ago after a journey begun at the rude hour of 0400.  Dulles is 104 miles from my house--as opposed to BWI (63) and National (75), but it alone offers non-stops to San Diego, and so I trek out here for much of my business travel.

When I scheduled this trip several months ago, I did so with little regard to other calendar items, like Thanksgiving.  When I realized that I had booked a flight on "the busiest travel weekend of the year", I began to worry, worrying being something with which I have a good deal of skill.  But I decided to stick with it, to trust to an early wakeup, TSA Pre, the United Lounge, and Group 2 seating.  All systems are go at this point, and we board in a half hour.

Heading back to San Diego through Wednesday evening, at which point I will red-eye back.  The client pays the airfare, but I pay the kicker to get into Economy Plus, not for leg room (no need there, right?) but for the added space within which to work with the computer.  I have a good deal of work to do in the next six weeks, and I can't afford to sit on my ass for six hours and watch movies.

Not that I didn't sit on my ass a bit this weekend.  It was a glorious Thanksgiving on the farm, thank you, and it was good to have the oldest Kitten home for a few days.  She has contracted some sort of ague, and appears to have passed it to her mother.  I am hopefully escaping this Ebola-like outbreak for the salubrious climes of Southern California.  Though I am reliably informed that it is going to rain two of the days in which I am there.  Lies.  Damnable lies.

I'm sure the Hammer will write about it later, but my Hoo's were awful against hated Virginia Tech the other night.  I described watching the game as like "watching two drunk people having sex.  With a goat.  On a trampoline."  Neither team was very good.  But fear not, it is now basketball season, and the Hoo's are currently ranked #8 and will likely move up in the next poll.  They are a deep, talented team, and they will make a run in March...count on it.

I expected a Ferguson-like mob here at the airport, never actually having traveled on this weekend via air before.  But alas, it is calm and quiet, with only the din of the refer compressor and the drone of Sports Center to disturb one's peace here in the hermetically sealed United Lounge.  Never before had I realized there was a cornucopia of soft drinks to make off with stuffed into the carry-on, to sustain one through the agony of waiting for the flight attendants ("we are here primarily for your safety") to make their way to me with coffee, water, etc.  I am now better informed and provisioned.

I am become huge, roly-poly and doughy, still somewhat puffed by the Thanksgiving gluttony.  My rig for this trip is modified standard, with UVA ballcap, white T shirt, blue blazer and trainers, this time bepantsed with aging tan cords, as my Adidas track pants were nowhere to be found.  The prospect of hip replacement surgery in February has become a fine excuse not to exercise or to exercise any gustatory restraint.  "Ah, I'll get the hip swapped out and then be able to be fit as a fiddle" is the refrain I hum as I shovel in the second piece of pumpkin pie.  This is of course, a great fiction, and I am using this week to get back on a trail of dietary discipline and light exercise.

I am one again trying a new Hotel in San Diego, this one a "hotel and marina".  The early timing of my flight leaves me unsure whether I will be welcomed long before "check-in" time, but I'm sure I can occupy myself should they not accommodate me.  My needs are modest--comfy bed, free wifi, free (or in this case, modestly priced) parking, breakfast, location.  Oh, and a gym should I actually do what I suggested above, exercise.

Enough for now, friends.  I need to make my way to the gate.  I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving.
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