Sunday, September 7, 2014

The Hammer's College Football RoundUp: Week 2 (or 3, depends on how you count it)

Well let's get right to critiquing this week's BIG TIME college football action. Yesterday in Charlottesville...HA HA, GOT YA! Yeah I know, UVA beat piddly little Richmond 45-13 and CW attended wearing this ridiculous straw fedora. It's been pointed out to him time and again that only Cubans and maricones wear such things but he won't listen. Whatcha gonna do?
Now back to the action: "Bama wore out Florida Atlantic yesterday at home. Not exactly big time but I like FAU (that's why I brought it up). Went to a soiree or two there back in my Florida days, man that might be the prettiest campus in the country. None of this old, tired faux Ivy League looking stuff, just palm trees and babes! Here's a good example, the FAU dance team (if I were younger Arthur Murray here I come). Anyway Alabama wore their asses out as one might expect.

The game of the week was #7 Michigan State at Oregon, and I think we can safely say the Quack Attack is back. The Spartans looked pretty good in the first half leading 24-18 at the break but The Ducks came out smoking in the second half with four touchdowns. Oh well. Tough times in Michigan these days, State loses and Big Blue looked like they had a case of big blue balls....maybe Wayne State won, must have a look. 

CW's second favorite team (after everybody else including the Red Army hockey squad), the unranked and unheralded (that'll sure change!) Virginia Polytechnic and State University Hokies went to the Shoe in Columbus, Ohio and kicked the living shit out of Ohio State currently ranked #8 by ESPN (that'll sure change!). I saw a bit of the game before the Cutty Sark and percocets kicked in properly and Va. Tech looked pretty darn good. They had a lot of chances to fold, and oh boy that's easy to do in front of 100K screaming rednecks (of the midwestern variety), but they didn't. Plus their offense looks like it actually makes sense. For years they opened up with 1st. down, halfback off tackle for a two yard gain. 2nd. down, fullback up the middle no gain. 3rd. and 8, what the hell do we do? Screw it, let's go off tackle again. Look, they won a lot of games but Jeez Louise, this ain't 1965 and the Bear is dead (don't mention that to any Alabama folks you know, you might get the hell knocked out of you). 

In local ACC play Clemson mauled SC State (they might want to consider scheduling them FIRST game), #21 UNC (please bitch!) hung on again San Diego State at home, the mighty Wolfpack came back against (do I have to say it?) Old Dominion after getting dominated most of the game (I'm convinced the football Gods are just toying with Wolfpack-Nation, trying to give hope where there is none). Duke looked good, Ga. Tech looked good and FSU looked good, all against chumps. I'd say if Flawda State is gonna get any competition in this league it'll be from Va. Tech. but you never know, Louisville or Duke might sneak one in.

Well that's it for this week. Next week Louisville is at Virginia (CW will call in sick for that one), NCSU in down in Tampax, Florida to take on the South Florida Bulls (coincidentally bull was my college nickname) and the biggie, Tennessee at Oklahoma (both 2-0). 

C-ya, wouldn't wanna be ya. 

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